Week Two, NFL

In week one, GB grits out a win over the pressed-into-service dog-killer himself, M. Vick. If Kolb had played all game the score would have been much more lopsided.
Ryan Grant is now done for the year. Brandon Jackson does a good job replacing him and GB does exactly what was expected, crushing the Bills. What makes this happy day even happier were the losses by Dallas and Minnesota. Apparently Purple Jesus is 40 years old. Who knew? Clay Matthews continues his evolution into a machine that destroys offending players. The special teams, kickoff returns especially, continue to improve. Bulaga was in at LT from late in the second half; has Chad Clifton started his last game for GB?
Looking ahead to week three, GB will be playing the Bears. GB will have to do a better job of stopping a running team equipped with a Marshall Faulk-style running back. The Packers will be able to handle Chicago’s passing game. Offensively GB should eat up the Bears. GB’s running game won’t terrify anyone, but with Rogers et al leading the way and commanding defensive adjustments, there should be running yards available.
Prediction: GB: 31 CHI: 17
Clay Matthews: 2 sacks and continued dominance. The man is an engine of destruction.

Some Gun Myths Have Their Lunch Money Taken

My experience leads me to agree with the author of this article. I especially like the admonitions of caveat emptor regarding “gun shop guy” in the article and comments.

When DIY Websites Go Sarcastic

How to buy milk. If you read all the way to the end of the article, the sarcasm thickens; an excerpt from step six: “Carry it home in a bag because it will make your hands cold.”
I had to double check, thinking that I was on The Onion’s website, but no.

Week One of the NFL

The pretenders have been (somewhat) separated from the contenders, as they say. The Jets, Cowboys, 49ers, Vikings, Chargers, and Indianapolis all went down. Both the contenders and pretenders have had some flaws exposed by their opponents. In the case of Green Bay, their limited depth on the defensive line may become a more serious problem in the coming weeks. The offense didn't exactly lay an egg, but didn't live up to expectations either. I think that they'll be just fine though. The defense overall played well in my opinion. Vick gashed them open for lots of rushing yards, but GB didn't game plan for him, and proper game planning is vital at the professional level. In the end, GB's defensive stars came out and shut down the Eagles just enough. Clay Matthews and Charles Woodson (among others) snuffed out Vick's last chance to tie the game, preserving the win.
My prediction was GB 31, PHI 13. If Kolb had been the starter all game I think that the final score might very well have been just that. We'll see how GB fares against the Buffalo Bills. Frankly the Bills suck and GB should just hammer them (knocking on wood.) We'll see.

SSG Giunta Receives Official Notice of His Large, Titanium, Balls

It has taken nine years, but a serviceman will both earn a Medal of Honor and be breathing when he has it draped around his neck. He's not from my old outfit, but is a paratrooper so close enough. Well done and don’t earn another one if you can help it. BTW, it seems one must be a paratrooper to know how to properly wear a beret. Usually the misshapen floppy black beret perched upon the skulls of the hapless and misbegotten appears as nothing more than the result of an unfortunate landing site of a worn, windblown, black sock.
I can't help but notice the official White House blog has BHO's picture associated with this story. I suppose the purpose of the WH blog is to help us all love our dear leader more, but still...

The Most Unintentionally Creepy Line In A Song Ever

Turning Japanese

“I want a doctor to take your picture
So I can look at you from inside as well…”
From the song “I Think I’m Turning Japanese” by The Vapors.  Later covered by Liz Phair.

Week One GNB v. PHI Prediction

The Packers offense isn’t a chimera, and will put up ridiculous numbers throughout this season. There isn’t anything else that can be said about them.
The defense though, will be interesting to watch. Al Harris is out for the first six weeks on the PUP list, but he isn’t the corner that he once was anyway. The safety play will also be key early this season. Atari Bigby will be hanging out with Harris for six weeks and his replacement, Morgan Burnett is as green as the 9th hole at Augusta. If Tramon Williams has a good first six games in his absence look for Harris to come back as the nickel back. Speaking of green, Sam Shields makes Burnett look like a third-year pro. Raw is an understatement. Let’s hope that his superior athletic ability will be enough to keep him above water until Bigby is back. The defensive line looks like it should be strong this year, not top five or maybe even top ten strong, but up to the job of keeping the opposing linemen busy and off of the linebackers, the running lanes tight, and perhaps with some bonus pass rush against inferior offensive lines. The linebackers I believe will have a strong season as a group. The keys will be Clay Matthews following up his great rookie season, AJ Hawk becoming more than just a solid starter, and some pass rush and short zone protection from the other two starters.
Special teams as the old saw goes, haven’t been all that special lately. Everything about the kick return game, offensively and defensively, have been within reach of disastrous for years, and last season Mason Crosby only made 75% of his kicks. Not good enough for the NFL, but the coaching staff has confidence in him and didn’t even bother to bring in a camp leg for competition. The punting game…let’s not discuss that. I’ll just say that it can’t really get much worse so whoever it is they kept will be an improvement. The relatively low turnover among the team’s starters is a hopeful sign that the non-specialist special team guys will be improved this year. I hope.
Week One Prediction: GNB 34 PHI 20. Look for the game to be won with turnovers and defensive pressure.

I Thought That I Had It Bad

Looking at these combat rations which are being fed to the troops of our allies, suddenly I don’t feel as horrible as I had remembered. MREs aren’t high culinary art, but look at what those poor bastards from the Ukraine and South Korea are wolfing down. Cultural relativity aside, those guys are eating mediocre dog food.
It's been twenty years now since I've eaten an MRE in anger, but they don't look much different. Different menus, better food, more variety, but still the same stuff more or less. No military spends as much time as the US forces do, even disregarding this whole war on terror. The US Army has spent lots of time and effort creating better combat rations, and I doubt that better ones are made, cultural food preferences aside. I always remember that the French were reputed to have good meals but after looking at that photo, I'm not so sure.

When Will Vampires, Werewolves, and Zombies Jump The Shark?

I’ve been observing the contemporary fad, zombies, for awhile now. Their new compatriots the vampires and werewolves have also crawled into our collective consciousness’. What is behind it? I tried to explain a fad from my youth to The Varmint the other day: pet rocks.

She just laughed at me and said “Are you serious?” Truly, I was. Pet rocks were a pretty self-limiting contagion though. Zombies, vampires, and werewolves (ZVW) have a long, long, history, though. Many cultural groups scattered across the globe and through history have their own versions of ZVW lore. The monster in the dark. The monster that carries off the unwary, the unchaste, the unfortunate. Monsters have always had a place in our legends. Grendel surely wasn’t the first, and the sparkly vampires of Twilight intensely hypersexual Trueblood brood surely won’t be the last. They have always been there, just not so…omnipresent.

Jumping the shark, though? Daylight vampires seem to be a first step towards that. Vampires in the cheerful daylight are an absolute abnegation of what those monsters are. The Shadowspawn of S.M. Stirling’s A Taint in the Blood strike me as a much more realistic (if the word can apply) imagining of the ZVW mythos. The Shadowspawn see us as little more than cattle, and why should they? They rule the world from behind the stage, much as the sinister puppet masters that they are. The Shadowspawn owing to their very long lives are fossilized reactionaries who long for nothing less than the bad old days, hating the modern world very non-cordially. As a group they are immensely wealthy, powerful, and influential. They use those attributes for their own ends, as a dairy farmer milks or culls as he desires.

What does this have to do with the ZVW phenomenon slipping blissfully into that long night? I see the Shadowspawn of Sterling and the sparkly vampires of Twilight fighting for ownership of the new ZVW mythos. Perhaps not an existential crisis, but conflict regardless. If Stirling doesn’t carry the day, then sparkly vampires and their Disneyfied cousins will transform the monsters of our nightmares and legends into nothing more than the literary equivalent of Three’s Company. Charming, I suppose, but mindless fluff in any event. What I want to know is when can I get back to serious business, like Civilization V?

Still single? What's the matter with you? - CNN.com

The short answer is that if she had wanted to get married, she should have done so at least ten years ago. It is now, alas, too late. The usual lament one hears is "where are all the good men?" The answer which I'm positive she doesn't want to hear is: the good men are back in her twenties, where she left them. I shouldn't have to tell her. If she is the least bit perceptive and honest with herself she already knows this. If the thought of never marrying bothers her (and it does) then this though keeps her up at night, wondering "what if..."

That's right -- it just hasn't happened yet. Single women aren't screwed up (well at least no more than anyone else out there), we don't need to register for self-improvement seminars or undergo eight years of psychoanalysis. There's nothing more we should or could be doing and nothing we need to change. It just hasn't happened yet.

She goes on to repeat the plaintive mantra, "It just hasn't happened yet" over and over. This may be hard to hear, but since she is a scientist (PhD in psychology) the math speaks for itself. It isn't going to happen. The only realistic set of choices she has left now are whether she is going to be the cool aunt that everyone will secretly believe is gay, or whether to stockpile cat food. Who knows, though. She may find the love of her life next week. Hope springs eternal, they say. I'll buy a lottery ticket next week, too.

Two More Reasons Why College Isn't All It's Cracked Up To Be

Truer words are rare to read or hear. I'm such a different student today than I was back in 1983 that I find it had to believe that I'm actually the same person. That comparison is absurd, of course. I'm not the same person at all. Nineteen year-old schlubs for the most part don't have a clue. I didn't, and the vast majority of those I've known haven't either. No crime of course, but knowing who we are is the most powerful knowledge one can have.

The students who have come to college after a hitch in the military or working for a few years know why they are in college, why they are taking a particular course, and what they want out of it, in ways that kids fresh out of high school seldom do. Apart from that, quoting my wife, "Henry James wasn't writing for nineteen-year-olds." Neither were Aristotle, Milton, or Adam Smith.

The reason why I was suspended from college (academically) back in 1984 was a direct result of my age, nineteen, and my maturity level, poor. The reason why Phi Beta Kappa keeps trying to sell me pins now is also a result of my current age. Rather, it is the result of what I've seen, done, talked about, experienced, read, and been, since 1983.
I find myself sitting in class thinking about my fellow students. I want to tell them to take this seriously, that there are enough hours in the week to study and party and watch Adult Swim. Alas, those who would heed the advice don't need it, and those who do would give me that blank look that says "If it's too loud then you're too old."
An aside: my daughter said that to me the other day. She is 10.

As I always say: read it all and chase down the links for context.

I would have thought that they had it first

Slashdot Technology Story | Space Station Astronauts Gain Internet Access

The ISS finally got their internet installed. Their ISP must be Comcast.
I would have thought that a space station would have been the first place wired up; irony must rear its snarky head . . .

Olbermann Tells Us What He Really Thinks

Hot Air » Blog Archive » Olby: Massachusetts suddenly turned racist!

It's not just Olbermann, either. What Olbermann is what many, many, lefties really believe to be true. Any sign of conservative or even libertarian beliefs are considered evidence of deep-seated racist, misogynist, and knuckle-dragging ideology, and is to be loathed.
He's just saying what they all think.

The Film Adaptation of The Hobbit Is Moving Along

This is nothing less than the best news I've heard from Hollywood in ages.